26 Billion Online Player Burned!

26 Billion online player was burned by (MGd) Runner from K106.  (idF) Nec Reus was setting sending a rally on an alliance mate of Runner’s so he did what any good alliance mate would do, he set a counter rally!  Only the target was a 26 billion player known to be online!  The result?  See for your yourself!


26 Billion Burned!
26 Billion Burned!

To add insult to injury, (idF) Nec Reus lost his hero on the attack to our alliance member, (MGd) Carebear X

The kingdom later rallied to further destroy (idF) Nec Reus.

(MGd) Mopar Lar burns 26 Billion!
(MGd) Mopar Lar burns 26 Billion!


When the dust settled (idF) Nec Reus had lost some 4 billion power.


It was an amazing display of power from (MGd) and the kind of core crafting intelligence coming out of this alliance from K106.  Pushing the envelope is what they enjoy doing!  Congratulations Guardians!

Kingdom Merge – The End or Beginning for Small, Non-Spenders?

Dawn of a New Age or the End of the Line

I logged in late last night to find my main and farms scattered throughout this new kingdom we had been dumped into and honestly wasn’t sure what to expect.   First, for those of you new to the idea of mergers, MZ takes two old kingdoms, gets them to spend a small fortune building troops and nasty cores, and unleashes them on each other.  The victor keeps their kingdom; the loser loses theirs in short order.  We lost and yesterday, Veteran’s Day 2015, we were evicted.

Kingdom Merge

So I am a new resident of kingdom 106.  So far? So good!  The kingdom seems far more active than #94 Dahae had become.  I guess when you double the active population of a kingdom instantly that happens.  I do wonder several things about the kingdom’s future and the future of us, it’s residents.   Before I delve into the topic, let me just say I am in general all for KVK kill events and want to take and destroy as much as possible from the enemy kingdom in those short 24 or so hours as I can.   I do have a different view on intra-kingdom politics and growth I guess.  I worked with several others to build a peace after the decline of DF in #94.  That peace was broken a few months ago by he who shall not be named.  Not because it will cause fear, but rather he is a massive egomaniac and feeds on attention.

When the dust settled, only a few main clans were still in a battle against this fool and his band of merrymen.  That fight continues today.  What’s interesting is that by letting them focus on a few well shielded and quite capable of dealing with the morons alliances, the smaller alliances flourished.  Silver and food were always in need.  A good sign of a kingdom with non-cash players seeking to grow.  The problem was these clans not protecting themselves were often unshielded.  Three days after every KVK kill event the list of often the same heroes being killed streamed across kingdom chat.  These players might have been free to farm and such but they got lazy.   That brings me back to #106.

What about the small players?

We are a large clan with deep farm systems, strong ties to other clans and friendships across kingdom lines.  As such, we had contacts in 106 and had something of an idea of what we were getting ourselves into.   That is well and good on clan built on a year plus of nearly constant war but what of these smaller players? What of the non-cash players?  Why keep playing?  Why are they even important to the game? Why? Why? Why?

In general small and non-cash players in the MZ-sense of the game bring little value.  They will need to play for 100s of years to finish the current researches without speeds or the token three days Athena gifts every now and then.  They are really just targets for malcontents wishing to hit and destroy without regard.   Or are they?

Game of war is a two dimensional game driven by algorithms and money.  What MZ and the fools I mentioned above fail to realize is that the game is largely secondary to many.  I imagine non-cash players would have long-ago quit save one thing.  This game is very social.  You get in a clan, you get to know the players, you know their hobbies, you celebrate the birth of their children, and are somberly reminded of your own RL fragile state when one dies or they lose a family member.   You see the small players play for reasons the huge players know but perhaps dont appreciate. They want to be with their friends or try and accomplish something all the while some thug is burning them down.  The admire that in those players.   We, either cash players or in large clans, ought take note of the fact that these smaller players bring a lot of depth to the kingdoms they live in.   They are not worthless as some idiots have suggested.   I commend them on their efforts.

So back to 106 and where does this all leave us.   I took a look about the kingdom to add fresh bookmarks as MZ kindly deleted all of my old ones.  A help as #94 is vaporized.  I see a number of these smaller clans, shielded small group and the usual sprinkling of dead accounts.   So I think with some certainty that this is not the end of the line.  It is the dawn of a new game built on the back of the same slow servers with a load of fresh faces, uncertain alliances, egoes larger than life, and a bunch of those non-cash players who give me hope.  Hope that in a RL world consumed by the need for wealth we too can find the silver lining in things….even as some ty to burn it all down.


Hey gang!

Darkthorne here, webmaster of Gameofwartips.com!  Thank you all for visiting and making us apart of your life!  You guys rock!  I want to thank StlDoc for joining our team along with HarryCubed and LegHumper and all the victims of MGd rallies that provide us with content for the site!

A big thanks to StlDoc for his perspective piece on the recent kingdom merge.  I can’t wait to see more from him.

Thanks again and war on!


Merge Kill Event Over – A Tale of Two Kingdoms

This is a great time of sadness and woe.

Crying and sobbing everywhere.

This is a time of great happiness and cheer.

Laughter and drunken slurred speech everywhere.

We fought well, men, women, even children.

We learned a lot, and despite many troops dying,

we may actually be stronger.

We fought well, all of us, and we learned that the guy named

Leg Humper is one screwed up and awesome guy.

Dahae can be proud. We fought together,

Like Cats and Dogs and Mice and Fleas all

standing shoulder to shoulder to fight off

the evil Rhinos and Two Hump Camels.

(FilthySanchz: hehe….Two Hump)

Kranarius can be proud. We FREAKING WON!

Soon, we will be moving over to our new and foreign land

looking to rebuild and start anew. Hoping we get good neighbors

who bring us brownies and fruitcake.

They’ll be coming over soon, guys!

Look for good spots for them to port

and put a few farms there so we always

have a spot we can sneak into!

I hope they don’t read Leg Humper’s blog and think about

a strategy that might make our move more difficult.

LOL That guy Leg Humper just posted he hoped we

didn’t read his blog. WOW! Like WHO DOESN’T!?!?!

So while our major alliances and leaders, and a handful of

rogue players who really never wanted to be a part of a greater good

for Dahae will all be porting over, we can be proud we put up a good

fight and can be optimistic that our new

kingdom-mates know how to fight as well.

Hah! Those idiots lost, and they’re still trying to make themselves

feel good about it! Wiping them out of existence will be easier

than we’d hoped for! Keep pretending to be friendly!

We’ve met some great people so far.

And also some guy named Zeus.

LOL! They’re totally buying into it! Keep it up guys!

There’s Witchy, Dixie, Trippy, Mazzy, Slammy, Batsh1tCrazi and Dread.

(I feel like I’m naming the 7 Dwarves. Or Santa’s Reindeer!

On Dixie, on Witchy! On Donner, on Blitzen!)

And Lord, and Gnarl, and Dropkick, AllyK, Cortez,

Raven, 8Ryan8, and SO many more, I KNOW I’m leaving

a bunch out, and I’m so sorry, because my chat doesn’t scroll back

to see the names of the people we’ve chatted with!

Just one dude to remember. Leg Humper.

If we get him on our side, we’ve already won.

We’ll be a stronger kingdom together,

as we can lead more rallies on more targets,

and once we work out how we each work,

working as a team will mean greater KVKs and Kill Events

for Dahae……sob….I mean Krainarius.

We can make them trust us

and once we’ve gotten them to drop their guard

we can come in one night in one swoop and

level them all! Wipe them off the Kingdom Map!

(Insert evil laugh here)

Anyone here hear an evil laugh

coming from the next room over?

No? Ok. No worries then.

Hah! That was close. Shh you idiots.

So moving forward, we will be a FORCE to

be reckoned with, a tsunami overtaking a small fishing boat,

an army of Storm Troopers (when they were commanded by

Yoda, not later under Vader)

We’ll be the Death Star, blow them all up!

HAH! Good one! High Five!

(Sad music playing in the background, on a phonograph

player, with a warped LP, doing its best to not sound crackly

and old.)

So on Wednesday, we will all pack up our SH,

and put them in our handkerchief, tied to the end

of a stick, throw them over our shoulder and take the long walk

to Kranarius. Passing through small towns as we leave Dahae,

accepting small hand-made trinkets from local children,

offers of tea or food or sex from the local women, just as a thank you

for being great and upstanding individuals (while Balla gets rocks and

feces thrown at him by those same children, and some monkeys. Just

random monkeys in my vision here. Don’t judge.)

As we pass to the end of the Kingdom,

we stop,

turn around,

and look over it’s beautiful landscape,

remembering the great times we had here, the friends we’ve made

the enemies we’ve crushed, those who fell in battle and

couldn’t get back up, those who just pissed their pants the

first time they saw a rally coming and just decided to close the app

in hopes that it wouldn’t actually break their phone,

all of them. The ones who came, and went. The history,

the old alliances full of spit and vinegar ready to take on the world!

But ended up not learning where the shield button was fast enough.

So many we leave behind. We stare. Leg Humper stares.

A single tear forms and slowly drips down his cheek,

following the contours around and to the corner of his lip.

He sticks out his tongue and laps it up. (Making a slight slurping sound)

and says to the no one in particular…

” Dahae! It has been my honor and my pleasure to

fight on your land, kill your monsters, crawl through the forest,

sit atop the wonder throne as your king for a short while, (which, by the way

was the BEST and most prosperous

time Dahae every had, you’re welcome)

To you all here with me, I wish you the best of luck, no matter where you

make your new home, we will always consider each other neighbors,

and no matter what alliances you may join or ally with,

we will always call you BROTHERS in battle!

(Leg Humper points in the direction of Krainarius, away from Dahae)

He says “Onward HO!”  (AllieX, I promised a mention in my next blog, right?)

And All of Dahae walked into the sunset, heads held high by the knowledge that

Leg Humper was with them, and they were safe, and that was good.

The reached the top of the hill, and looked over the crest,

down below, they could see their new homeland, Kranarius.

It looked a LOT like Dahae, The hesitated, then began the march down the

hill toward their new home.

Solemn, but strong, united, a force they believed

would be able to withstand any opposition, because they had HEART!

(And Leg Humper)

Hey guys! Here they come (snicker)

They’re shorter than I pictured.

They smell like monkey feces.

Oh wait, that’s just THAT one.

Everyone, pretend to be friendly!

Filthy. Pick your pants back up and please stop waving that thing around.

You’re gonna knock someone out with that thing.


Thank you for reading this far.


Hero: Leg Humper

Alliance: MGd

Kingdom: DAHAE #94 for just  2 more days.

Merge Event is Here! The Leg Humper Chronicles, Part II

The Leg Humper Chronicles, Part II

A Thanksgiving Historically Accurate Story

A Modernized telling of the story of Thanksgiving.

Many of you know the story of how the Holiday “Thanksgiving” in the U.S. got started. But for those of you who do not. I’d like to give you an updated version using current characters you can all relate to.

Yes, there were the Pilgrims and the Indians in the original story, but in this story, we will use “DAHAE” and “Krainarius” as the two parties involved.

Like with the Native Americans/Indians, there were many tribes in Krainarius. There were LS and Ueh, and Fj and eSH, Like the various tribes of yore, each of these alliances had their own personalities, respected leaders, warriors, home makers, & village idiots, I’m sure if you ask each of these alliances which of their members fit each of those definitions, they can tell you quickly. I’ll leave that to them in the comments section below. For a more extensive list of characters in each alliance, please see my blog here


Told to you from this point on from Leg Humpers perspective. Keep in mind, most of this is completely true and unchanged from the actual events.)

Well, one day, the Pilgrims of Dahae landed on a rock (said ouch, then limped for a few steps before going back to walking normal again) and looked around at this new land called Krainarius. “We COULD make this our new home, it’s possible, but really, I like my OLD home better. We should battle the natives of this land and then change the whole landscape of their kingdom to look and feel more like ours.”

We all met at a table in a clearing and sat down to eat. Much food was supplied, as the land was filled with animals and fruits and vegetables (and so as not to offend anyone, there was Vegan stuff too…ok? There….freaking Vegans….especially the “militant” Vegans…the’re the worst. Well, maybe not as bad as the “mostly” Vegans, who are only Vegan when it makes them feel better than those around them, then munch a sloppy cheeseburger as soon as your not looking….THOSE Vegans are the WORST!)

The food served was amazing, meat from local sources like roasted Cockatrice, Fried Minotaur hooves, Boiled Hydra scales, Sauteed vampire tongue (Topped with ground Headless Horseman teeth….yummy!), Manticore lips, Griffin scrotum (Not as easy to procure as you might think.) and even the little known delicacy, Rectal Orifice of Basilisk dip. (Tastier than you might think, apparently, as it was all gone by the time I got to sit at the table)

We all ate like kings, smiling and laughing. I told stories about my past, all of the Krainarius residents laughed and pointed at me, signifying that they were saying they thought I, specifically me, Leg Humper, was entertaining them and a very funny person. Obviously laughing WITH me, not AT me like some tried to tell me.

Then the dinner took a turn for the, shall we say “worse?”

Fighting broke out everywhere. There were accusations that Witchy was a double dipper, that Cerese didn’t wash her hands after high fiving Filthy. That this girl was hotter than that girl, or that guy was gayer than this other guy. Etc. Typical things that start fist fights at biker bars and Amish family gatherings, you know. Tables were overturned, but two tables remained, separated by a distance that might have well been a full kingdom away.

Quickly, Smackdown of VK and LORD of L.S. each ran to a table and stood upon it. claiming that THEY would be king, no one would DARE touch them! The fighting was all around them, and the surveyed, but for a long while, the fighting mostly stayed away from them. Dahae beat up on Krainarius. Krainarius beat up on Dahae. It was like a scene out of a 1970s Chop-Socky Kung Fu movie. Students of the MOS KEE DO Dojo vs the students of the “DRAGON ASS KUNG FU” Dojo. Hundred of matchups all ongoing, non stop. While our stories’ hero, me, Leg Humper, walks through the fracas, untouched. Looking for someone to fight, he found no one available.

(Then, a GONG sounds. SUPER ZOOM IN on Leg Humpers face, recognizing a worthy opponent, then SUPER ZOOM IN on his counterpart, a man named CORTEZ. Cortez was a beefy man, who stared at Leg Humper while Leg Humper stared back. Keep in mind, Leg Humpers “stare” is kind of like how a dog looks at you when you are making a ham sandwich. While Cortez stare is more like how a Vegan looks at you while you’re buying the meat for that sandwich)

I, Leg Humper react first, CHARGING! Putting on my war gear while I run, I SLAM into Cortez full force. The impact shakes the land, The battles raging on around us pause, they look to see what happened, then go back to battling. It was an explosion that would have killed the Dinosaurs twice over, or about half as powerful as the thrust a horse feels when FilthySanchz is suddenly in the mood for some horse nookie.

When the impact tremors had finally settled down. I, Leg Humper woke up to find myself tied to a tree while Cortez sat in a lawn chair with a piece of hay hanging out of his mouth, and a mangy dog sitting at his feet licking his toes.

“Yo, Leg Humper. Glad you woke up”

“Where am I?”

“My PRISON, or at least something that works as my prison for now.”

“Can I leave?”

“Sure, wanna hit me again? or at least TRY to hit me again?”

Leg Humper rubbed the back of his neck, realized how sore his whole body was from the impact, and said “no. Did I at least hurt you?”

“Eh, a little, kind of like getting stung by a wasp in the eyelid. I won’t be dying from it, but I did cry, a little bit.”

As I walked away, slowly, sore, like a cowboy who’d been riding his horse for a full day, Cortez said “Any time you want another go, come on back!”

I, Leg Humper, turned back, put my hand out and was met with Cortez strong grip in a manly handshake. We looked each other in the eyes, mutual respect obvious. (Or at least, I had respect for him, what he was feeling, I don’t real know if it was respect, or some sort of attraction, who knows. I mean, really, look at me, I can understand why he’d be attracted to me. Heck, I look at myself in the mirror sometimes and WISH that the guy staring back was real.)

As the fighting died down and became more focused on the table that LORD was occupying, the previous enemies were taking Leg Humpers actions as a sign that all would be ok in the long run, and were engaging in hand shakes with their enemies as well. (Some of them still punching each other in the groin as they shook with their other hand, but still, it’s promising, and heart warming.)

An epic battle would soon be waged at this table. I will give you the shortened version of this, as obviously you’re all here to hear about me, Leg Humper.

For hours, Zane, of MGD, fought hard to knock LORD (and other members of his tribe, L.S.) from the table. The battles were close, but Zanes attempts proved to be just shy of enough to accomplish the goal. LORD even came to the edge of the table, waving his arms frantically, but regained his balance just in time to keep up top.

Later, more battles at the table ensued, with Zane, and the newest Picnic Table Warrior Attillas Fury, working with Tribe ODU and VK to unseat L.S. from this table. (A short tangent here. Why are we fighting over a table anyway? I mean really, sure, it gives one member of their tribe the ability to save time on his homework, but really, except during battles in Kill Events, what’s the real point of standing on a table? It’s a freaking TABLE for goodness sake!)

FINALLY, after hours (and dare I say, half a day!) of battling it out, The MGD famed hero MOPAR LAR (The 2nd most famous person in Dahae, after, of course, me, Leg Humper. After all, I have a blog and speak in the 3rd person. He doesn’t do EITHER of those things. Puh LEESE!) came to the table.

“We will do battle”

Lord: “Yes, we will”

The two men and their armies were silent as they prepared for the battle that would ensue. Mopar put on his gear, Lord put on his.

Mopar charged the wonder several times, and was turned away each time, but the battles were so close (5-15k troops on some) that the battle raged on without either man giving up an inch. Mopar, after each battle, took out his Bedazzler and tried different shiny gemstone patterns on his war gear, looking for that one pattern that would work to distract LORD enough to unseat him. (I guess “un-table” him would be more proper?)

The battles raged on, like a ROCKY vs APOLLO CREED battle, there was no clear and obvious winner, and Mopar got a couple of great shots in, knocking LORD off the table, only to have LORD come back and retake the table. It was like watching the greats duke it out. ALI vs Frazier. Godzilla vs Mothra. Babe Ruth vs Hot Dogs and Beer, Leg Humper vs God, Optimus Prime vs Megatron, Yoda vs the English Language, Cartman vs Bart Simpson. (Cartman won that one handily)

The greatest matchups of all time. The kind that when the battle is over, the crowd thanks the winner AND the loser with a standing ovation. The winner and loser both feel as they’ve given their best, and both know that on another day, the outcome could be reversed. The mutual respect given. THAT kind of battle. yeah. It was great to watch!

(As Harrycubed below)
So, with my wife giving me a look that was meant to tell me “You’ve been playing your silly game all day and need to spend a little time off the phone and being with me, even if you’re only faking it and thinking about your next blog, it’s time.” You know the look. I had to stop and log off to cook dinner, watch a little tv, tell my wife about my GOW day, ask her about hers. (To which I got a look that meant “You idiot, I’ve been talking to you all day about stuff and you’ve been ‘mmm hmm’ing me about almost all of it, you’d BETTER know what you agreed to or you’re gonna be sorely surprised” You know what I mean.) I signed off for a bit, and when things settled down, I started this blog. Hope you enjoy it.

So far, I’ve met some pretty great people from #106, Krainarius. I won’t name you here, as I’d be likely to leave plenty more out. And much like a teacher on the first day of school, I have to learn SO MANY of your names, while you all really only need to learn one. Leg Humper. Owned by the great Harrycubed.

Thank you #106 for being pretty awesome so far, great fighters from what we’ve seen and experienced, and future allies. (Though still enemies for another 20 hours or so…..) And thanks to almost all of Dahae for working together and helping and supporting each other in this 2 day kill event. It’s mentally exhausting, physically draining, and honestly, emotionally tiring to be this funny, all the time. I do it for all of you, so a nice “Thank you” or “LOL” would be appreciated.

Please comment in the comments below, and pass this blog and this site along to our friends. Darkthorne works hard to keep this site fun and interesting, as well as informative and current. More hits makes him happy!

Thanks for reading.


Hero: Leg Humper

Alliance: MGd

Kingdom: DAHAE (Hopefully, tomorrow will still be DAHAE)


A Merge Event is Coming!

Chronicles From Leghumper’s Perspective

Ok, so CHRONICLES might be a bit of an over exaggeration, but for now, it at least got your attention!

Tonight begins a new chapter in our Kingdom (#94) and in #106 as we enter a 2 day MERGE EVENT with the loser being absorbed into the winning kingdom.

It’s a scary thing, though really, if that’s the only 2 outcomes, I guess it’s not really THAT big a deal, as either way, we are merging.

What do we lose out on if we lose?
The cool name “DAHAE”, (I pronouce it Dah Hay, but It could also be French, like “De Hey” or like Tatoo from Fantasy Island as in “Hey Boss! Da Hay! Day Hay!” or like “Rerun from that old 1970s show What’s Happening? “Da Hay HAY hay!”)
Our Bookmarks? I barely use them.
Our landscape, knowledge where everything is? Like when you stay at a friends house and it’s dark and you don’t know where the light switches are, you fumble around, trip over the dog, etc?
Our very IDENTITY!?! For as long as we’ve played this game (Or at least many of us, who have never been in another kingdom, like the guy who marries his high school sweetheart and has never been with another lover) we are DAHAE! We tell people in real life we are DAHAE, we tell our spouses and our kids we are DAHAE. (Now, don’t get me wrong, no one really cares, but still, we TELL them…..)

SO as we move forward in a few hours into the event, it’s scary. Will our allies find other allies who make them no longer need us? Will our enemies find new friends to make them a new threat? Will they be better than us at everything relegating us to 2nd class citizens in our own new home? Will we meet anyone we like? Will we be the outcasts? Will they make fun of our avatars and make us cry? The future is unknown. At least staying in our own kingdom, as dysfunctional as it is, the dysfunction is known. The unknown is SCARY!

Humans don’t do well with unknowns. Especially intelligent ones. Intelligent people will try to find order, explanations, try to put things in their proper places and see things that have some sort of SENSE! Luckily, I’m not all that smart, so I only worry about where I’m gonna have to port my SH and farms in the new kingdom if we lose.

But really, The UNKNOWNS. Human being HATE unknowns. When was the last time someone handed you a box, unlocked, but said, whatever you do, DON’T open it. Drive you batty? Open it anyway?

How about someone who leaves you a message “I need to talk to you right now, it’s important” and then no details? If you’re like me, you will then begin texting, calling, yelling out your upstairs windows, passing notes to your friends in study hall, sending out smoke signals, whatever you can do to find out WHAT that message was all about.

It’s scary. I don’t like it. In a few days, the dust will be all settled and either win or lose, we’ll make do with what we have. New friends, new enemies, new landscape, etc.

My HOPE is that our new combined kingdom will be working together for a greater good. Whether its to kick some hind-quarters in KVKs, or to perhaps put together a kick-buttocks Super Wonder team, or perhaps some other direction that makes sense for the new DUAL KINGDOM as a whole.

From my very first blog, I’ve stated I’m not a fan of the “attacking civilians” type of play. Hitting our own kingdoms players while on tiles, or just hitting a SH just because it’s a “War Game’ has never been my style. Hitting an enemy? Attacking Outlanders, strategizing at the wonder? LOVE that stuff! Love the rush, the heart beating out of my chest in that moment after a rally lands but you don’t know if your getting your hero back or you’re burning your target. LOVE it.

I would hope that the new kingdom-mates we acquire or join with will have the same philosophy and we can continue to grow, and progress, rather than perpetuate the infighting and drama that can destroy a whole kingdom.

As of this moment, the KVK merge event hasn’t started. I’m excited. Looking forward to it. I, and my alliance, and my alliances allies, will be fighting hard for Dahae, to KEEP dahae, to WIN for Dahae, and hopefully after it’s all over, our new residents and us can work together for the greater good and start a great WINNING STREAK of KVKS and tournaments!

If we end up winning one of those tournaments that allow us to change our kingdoms name, I’m pretty sure it will be unanimous when the vote is held and the new combined kingdom will take the name “LegHumpersHome” as really, it’s what’s most important. Isn’t it?

Thanks for reading this far, thanks for enjoying my other blogs. (or at least reading them and/or pretending to enjoy them)

Perhaps signing off for the last time as a Dahae resident, perhaps signing off for the last time before another kingdom comes and joins us. Time will tell.

Good luck Dahae! Kick Deriere!
Leg Humper
a.k.a. Harrycubed
Alliance: MGd
Kingdom: #94, DAHAE (For now at least)

p.s. To our future allies, friends and even our enemies, I hope you do well in this event, I truly do. I hope you finish as high as 2nd place in this event. It will be a great feather in your cap to be able to tell our loved ones “Hey, we did well, we lost only to the great Leg Humpers Kingdom” and there will be much rejoicing in the land.