Quit Game of War

A dear friend of mine wrote this nearly 2 years ago. He’s remained a good friend by means of Facebook and Line App. Several readers have recently found his farewell to GoW article and I thought it timely to repost.  Perhaps his sentiments will resonate with you or a friend who recently decided to break or give up the Game of War.

To those still fighting on…Good luck! I’ll be here as long as I can navigating you through the treacherous waters of both your known enemy (that guy setting a rally on you) and that pesky other enemy (we will just refer to them here as “the creators.”

They are just that, creators. They create either fun or angst.  You decide.  Enjoy this classic farewell and be sure to read some of Harrycubed’s previous works when we were all fresh, new, and excited about the Game.

#SaveGameOfWar #StopcancellingKillEvents #weGetItWeBuyPacksBeforeAKillSoGoaheadAndGiveUsOne

Again, enjoy…

My Farewell: Quit Game of War.

Me: “My name is Harrycubed. I am a former GOW addict. ”

Crowd: “Hi Harrycubed”.

One guy in the back: “Wait, the great Leg Humper? THAT Harrycubed?”

Me: “Yes. Yes. THAT Harrycubed”.

Guy: “I’ve heard stories about you. I just assumed they were too amazing to be true!”

Me: “They’re all true”

Crowd murmurs. Things like “No way!” “Whoa” and “Holy cow!” and even a few “We’re in the presence of GOW royalty!”

Guy: “Tell us a story! An epic tale! A story about your travels through GOW! Tell us! Please! Bless us with more Harrycubed!”

Me:”Well, perhaps I could tell you the story of why I left GOW”.

GOW. And why I had to leave.
By Harrycubed. Narrated by Leg Humper.

A little over 2 years ago, a friend of mine (Kempo in GOW) tried to get me to play this new game he was into. Game of War. I said no. No way. Not another game. Can’t do it. No.

“But look, you can decide to attack someone, and you just pick up your base and move it right next to them!”

I resisted for months. Every time we met, he’d try. A little harder. He knew he’d win eventually. Frankly. So did I. But it was a small victory for me to resist for as long as I did.

Finally. He showed me a bit of the game on his phone. I broke. Downloaded it followed the tutorial. I was in.

This was the end of my PGOW (PRE-game of war) life and the beginning of my AGOW (active game of war) life.

Slowly. I learned the ins and outs of the game. There was a lot to it. Troops training. Research. Construction. Wall building. Quests. Wow. so much to do.
I watched as my friends attacked “enemies” and even rallied monsters. Those big scary bunnies!

I bought my first pack. I “broke the seal”. It was a bad move. Seeing all the stuff I got. Thousands of gold! A hundred days of speedups! Whoa! I would soon be king!

How can I attack someone!? Someone help me! Give me a target I can try to attack! (I had no idea what I was doing, and my alliance kept telling me to wait till I get the next tier of troops. I’d get t2, they tell me to wait till t3. I got t3. They said wait till I had t4…)

Finally, they couldn’t take it anymore and found me a target. A likely dead city. I asked a dozen questions and then pressed “attack”. A 25 minute March. I was nervous. Heart racing. Would/could I get attacked while
Marching? Would something happen that would cause me to lose badly? I had no idea! I stared at my phone screen without blinking, the whole March.

The attack landed. Delay. Delay. Delay. Fire! Yes! I won! The rush! The complete satisfaction in being able to take away someone else’s hard earned troops! Another step further into the “game of war addiction” darkness.

(Fast forward about a year.

High points:

  • My alliance merged with another. There was a minimum power to join the main alliance. I didn’t meet that minimum. Kempo convinced the “higher ups” that I would soon not only be above the minimum, I might be near the top of the alliance soon. I got to join the main alliance and I was the smallest. The “exception” to the rule. (I made 2 farms at this point. Called them “the exception” and “the rule”. Lol. Also found out how to change my “scroll”, and made it “I may be small, but I’m stubborn”. Still remains that to today.)
  • We were a part of the Dreaded Legion (D) family. Supposedly they offered us protection and instruction, guidance to become great. Frankly, we were treated as the red headed step child. The big D alliance wanted us to send our biggest players to them, in a show of trust on our end, but really it was just to keep the DF alliance out of the top 3 in power to be eligible for a spot in the wonder rotation. We sent a few. A couple stayed. A couple came back. But our alliance never saw any benefit at all. We grew. We were the biggest D affiliate outside the MAIN D group but still got no respect. We talked about breaking away, but there was no real benefit to leaving…..yet.
  • One of our own, stormbrngr, decided he had to leave. His “farm system” was enormous for that time. He was a great guy and a very helpful coach for me and many others. Losing him would hurt. The person who took over his account, eternal zen, seemed like a nice guy too. I decided to approach him and see if he’d like to stay with us. He pretended to consider it, but ultimately decided to leave to stay with his alliance.
  • I strike up a conversation with mmd.
  • Me and r4s group chat with them.
  • They love me. (Of course) They decide to join us.
  • We become MGd. We are a couple dozen fighters and a whole bunch of farms. (Context, at this time, I was 138M (Yes, MILLION!) and our alliance was 2.8B. I was 2nd in power in our new alliance, behind only Mopar Lar. We were the 8th ranked alliance at the time of our merge) I was 5th in Kingdom in POWER, but #2471 in Kills. I spent a lot of my time building, but never really learned how to fight. This merge changed all that!
  • We are no longer D family, but still getting attacked by DF (after they promised that they wouldn’t attack if we weren’t in D. One of SO many lies they told).
  • We decide, behind our biggest player, Mopar lar, to go try to attack the wonder. (See the story in my blog: (DARK! Looking for my blog of how we took the wonder, didnt’ see it in the leg humper fan page, nor did I see the QAOJ hero will die song blog?) Thanks!
  • We take it from DF
  • Kuwait Wulf says to Mopar “give it to me to stop the fighting. I’ll hold it”. So. After earning a great victory, we decided to hand it off to Kuwait.
  • We grow. Gain some new players thanks to our show of force at the wonder. Suddenly, other big alliances are taking us seriously. We’re “invited” to the rotation for the wonder.
  • Darkthorne decides I’m an entertaining character in Alliance Chat, asks me to do a blog for this site.
  • I blog (You’re welcome)
  • We grow. Gain some more. Fight like killer wombats. We are a great alliance who has been given nothing, and play our own game.
  • Alliance City is released. (January 2015) NO KILLER WOMBAT! STILL ANGRY MZ!
  • Merge event.
  • New allies.
  • Old allies become enemies.
  • Personal attacks.
  • Real life blurry lines.
  • Mz bootings
  • Mz customer support sucks

Some personal shout outs. I don’t mean to leave anyone off the list below, these are just people I have something specific to say to. Many of you, I’ve already said goodbye IN game, and thank you for understanding.

Allie x. One of my longest tenured friends in game. More of our conversations have been non-GOW related than I realized. It’s been a pleasure. You have the social game to make others around you work together as a family. Keep it up! You FINALLY made my blog! Congrats!

Eternal zen. Like a guy who runs a red light and then 2 cars BEHIND him get into an accident, you had one important moment in the creation of Mgd, even though it may not have been obvious to many. Thanks! (And for all the info and knowledge we’ve gained from you over the last years!)

Sir Asher. Might be the only guy I’ve met in this game who could match my sarcasm level. You’re Canadian tho, so you still fall about 20% short. Sorry.

Sir brax. Respect for you and what you do in real life, thank you. We will meet one day, I hope.

Jawbreaker and Samubri. I know you didn’t chat much, but when you guys chimed in, it was always helpful and productive.

Stldoc. One of the most wide ranging personalities in this game. One of the most generous, and genuinely helpful players…..people I’ve ever met. Thank you, and thanks for all those you helped that didn’t appreciate it as much as you deserved.

Titan. Haven’t talked much lately. Where’s my ore!

Itsez. Early on, you had a reputation for being a total nut job. Well……um……I got nuttin else. Lol. Jk. Stay strong.

Canadian. Great rally leader. Great trap. Great at wonder. If I were smarter, better looking, knew more about the game, and had a little less sarcasm, I’d be you!

Big Plunger. The only GOW player I’ve met in real life, and I wasn’t disappointed. 4 hours of conversation and a whole Mets game (a win in the playoffs) later and you didn’t hate me!? Best friends for life! (That waitress DEFINITELY liked me more, but if you feel the need to believe it was you she preferred, then…well….enjoy living a lie…)

InZane. Dude. Lol. So at one point. You got zeroed and were a small potatoes. Then steroids and weight lifting regimen and BAM! HUGE! Kill! Kill! Kill! (If it moves? Kill it more!). Keep killing. Keep everyone afraid when you port in.

Ousig. We have the “old days”. Kinda funny that we can say that in this game. Been a long time. Keep being a strong part of the leadership of this great alliance. Size matters not!

Drew. The core guru. No one understands how much work you put into figuring out new ways to crush opponents. They all need to thank you!

Runner. Keep being the example for others to follow. Stay classy.

Emre. AKA HeavyThunder. I impart to you a great account. One that I have invested a lot of time and money in. A LOT of both. Leg Humper is mine. But the hero you have will perform his duties as much as anyone. Kill lots. Have major amounts of fun. Be strong for Mgd. Kick butt! (Ask questions. Lots of new stuff happening lately. We have a great alliance and tons of info can be garnered from them.).

Wicked Candy. One of the Smarter players I’ve met. If you spent like some, you’d run this game!

Blk Mamba. Bro. One of my favorite rally leaders. Keep kicking butt!

Julio Ceasar, General one, Attillasfury. At some point if we ever meet in real life, please make sure you have my home address so you can put me in a cab and send me home. Attach the following note to my shirt. “Harry has been returned safely to you, and in moderately good working condition. Please note. You may need to bring him to several psychiatrists and drug detox clinics to help him recover from what he did and saw while with us. Be comforted in the fact that we’re pretty sure he had a lot of fun before he was knocked unconscious by the transvestite stripper. Ignore his limp, it’ll go away in a few days. The facial tics, however, may be permanent.

Cy. I’ve talked to you a LOT on line. Real life is a lot of work! I know how hard you work, I can’t believe you do what you do and how much you do for others around you in your life. Me helping with your farms is so small in comparison. Don’t thank me for helping you. I thank you for helping those around you. Stay strong. It makes others stronger to know you’re there for them!

Philmont. The monster killer. If there’s anyone in GOW who kills more monsters than you do, I’ve never heard of them. You are THE monster killer.

Butterkup. You rock. You’re small. And help this alliance in some BIG ways! Thank you!

Lord Richi. Despite our language differences, you had some of the funniest chats I’ve seen. Thanks for making me smile!

Shizz. One of the few who stuck with me during those terrible overnight wonder holds. Not the only reason, but for that reason at least, I thank you.

Fabdog. Dude. If I’m in your area….we’re meeting!

Ferun. We still need to write an Mgd song for your hubby to sing!

Darkthorne. The reason I have a blog. The reason I’ve brought so much joy into so many people’s lives. The reason so many people know of Leg Humper and the great harrycubed. The reason people love and adore and respect me. Well. The reason is me. Frankly. I’m the reason for all those things. But you were smart enough to notice it and give me the opportunity. For that. I say. Congratulations. Honestly, we need to meet in person some day. Maybe Vegas next year?

Mopar. In many ways, Mgd became what it is because of you. (Really mostly because of me, but of the remaining portion, THAT portion is mainly because of you). The right balance of knowledge, stubbornness, moral fortitude, fighting ability, and just, CLASS. many times I found myself feeling like the little brother or like the son you wish you had. No matter how much you deny it, you KNOW you want to have me over for dinner some day. (Mrs Mopar already said yes anyway, so not like you have any say). Keep being the King Arthur of the round table.

To all the pandas. I can’t keep you guys straight. Don’t know which of you I like and don’t like. So I pretend to like
You all!

To all the players I’ve had the honor of playing with over these last 2 years…you’re welcome. You got to experience me. My wittiness and sarcasm, intelligent humor, amazingly interesting anecdotes and personal stories you all enjoyed no matter how many times you’ve heard them, have all made your lives just a little bit better. You’re welcome. Lol

To anyone featured in my blogs. You’re quite welcome for the boosts to your egos by being mentioned in a great harrycubed blog. I hope you enjoyed them and take them how they are meant, as satire and sarcasm, all in fun.

To my MGD alliance mates, Past and Present (and some in the future, as you will likely hear many stories of my greatness.) It has been a pleasure and honor to play this game with you all. My family and “real life” friends have heard about many of you and I have perhaps had more conversations with many of you than those real life friends over the last couple of years. Please keep this in mind. Your R4s TRULY DO CARE about this alliance, they fight, argue, and go to bat for MGD and it has caused real life strife in some cases. They CARE! They look out for everyone in the alliance, small or big, new or old, If you’re MGD, you’re MGD. Sometimes the conversations go on for weeks and months over certain topics or decisions, and I apologize if you’re not always “in the loop” with those decisions or their outcomes. It’s genuinely taxing and tiring on them, and when the path is declared, it’s often a huge relief and it doesn’t always get passed along in a proper manner. Hopefully the new R3 room and team facilitates that communication. But please trust that they DO have your best interests at heart.

Mz: screw you. You are one of the reasons I’m leaving the game. You made this game, with a social part that’s more than I’ve ever experienced in any game I’ve ever played. Made me care about the people. About my stronghold. About my troops. And then I had frustration with the constant booting and the “glitches” like when cores don’t get put on in time, despite hitting the preset 30 seconds early. And then the customer service with all the “preformed form letter” responses. Nothing got accomplished nothing got better. For all the above, and more, Mz. Screw you.

To the Kingdom Chat warriors. We’re all guilty of getting frustrated and/or making things personal in chat. I keep at the forefront of my consciousness that there are real human beings who are playing this game and chatting with me, and whether I like them or not, I will try to show respect. For those of you who have gotten personal, in my alliance or in others, please keep this in mind. It’s not necessary to make others feel like crap so you can feel better. Please, there’s enough negativity in this world. Don’t add to it.

So this is my official goodbye to the Game of War world. Like any addiction, I’m sure I’ll go through moments of weakness where I feel I want to come back. I will try to be strong.

Things I’ve noticed since I got out of GOW:

I have an extensive book pile that needs attention. I always ask for books as gifts. Since GOW, I find myself with very little free time.

I have a whole family living with me! I have some hot chick who claims to be my wife, and 3 smaller people who claim to be my kids. I will try to get to know them better. (Today is a HUGE blizzard, 2+ feet of snow after getting nothing all winter so far. I watched my “kids” and “dogs” play out in the snow as I put my arm around my “wife” and watched and smiled. My phone was in the other room, and I didn’t care about GOW in that moment…..if THAT doesn’t say something…..I don’t know what can!

I’ve learned that it’s easier to eat meals, especially meals that require 2 hands to use like a fork and knife at the same time, when you don’t have your phone in one hand.

Bowling is different. My balance is a bit thrown off as now my phone isn’t in my other hand while on the approach. It is still a little strange not being able to let the ball go, and immediately turn around and check my GOW.

I have a big screen TV. It plays pictures. I’ve always known it makes sounds. But wow. Good picture on it too! Weird thing, many of the actors on my favorite shows are a couple years older than I remember from my PGOW days.

I’m a much safer driver now.

I have to work on my posture. For 2 years, the hunched over old man posture worked for me to walk and sit while on Game of War. Now, I have to look forward. Weird.

I will not be playing mobile strike.

I have an iPad I no longer need. I bought it for GoW. Now…..it’s too big to use as an iPod, too small to use as a TV….anyone want to make an offer?

I can now lift a car with just my thumbs. The amount of texting and GOWing I’ve done over two years have built the muscles in my thumbs up to such a degree than the current body building champion has PMed me for advice, the UFC has asked me to sign a contract to NOT compete as it wouldn’t be fair, and I had to register my thumbs with the local police department and FBI as deadly weapons. North Korea recently decided to aim their nukes at other countries as they realized they ONLY had nuclear weapons, but the USA had Harrycubed’s thumbs. they definitely don’t want to start THAT fight.

Leg Humper has decided to retire from GOW as well, and has enrolled in a local tech school. He’s being trained in heating and air conditioning repair, but is having trouble overcoming his recent history. At school, so far, he’s been sent to the deans office many times, mostly for a) humping the teachers legs. (And one short teachers ear). B). Attacking one of the school mascots, a bunny. C) trying to get others to follow him into battle declaring the kitchen the “wonder” and declaring the kitchen staff as the enemies. D) when told by the teacher to start his research studies, he dropped a few rocks, sticks, some pieces of metal that look like bottle caps, A Big Mac and some silver anklet he “borrowed” from a leg humping conquest. And told the teacher to speed it up herself. E). One day he showed up in full samurai gear and proceeded to talk in Japanese to everyone, screaming at them and threatening them with his sword. It’s a tough adjustment for him. I have faith, just not a lot of it.

I have been in this game long enough to have “witnessed” many births, a few more deaths than I’d have liked, a couple of marriages, some major life changes like moving across country, etc. I have always tried to be a positive person and hoped to be positive for anyone around me who listened. I prefer not to be negative and I hope that my attitude helped some of you, heck, even just one of you, make it through some tough times. I know for a fact that some of you have helped me, even if you don’t realize it.

I have told epic tales for your entertainment and amusement. If you haven’t read my blogs, please read some. Read the story of the Ponzi Scheme Frat Boy party. Read the unbelievable stories about Leg Humper in a Russian Prison. (My personal favorite, and the one that really put me on the map of All-Time-Greatest Bloggers. Read about how GOW can translate into real life. (The image of my neighbors dogs being scared about my pet war elephant still makes me chuckle.)  Read about my Alliance City thoughts. WOMBAT! GIVE ME MY ALLIANCE CITY WOMBAT! Try to find the SONG I wrote about QAOJ losing her hero. (I don’t think QAOJ liked it much, but I hope she appreciated that amount of work that went into re-writing “American Pie” in her honor.) Read my first blog post where I talk about how sarcastic I am. Read about what it takes to make a successful alliance. Read the GOW ADDICT QUIZ. Heck, read them all. They’re all pretty fantastic. You deserve a good smile.

I’ve freed up about 4GB of space on my phone when I quit Game of War. Screen shots, PW lists, web sites, core/piece lists, etc. All gone. Good news now, I wonder if i run GOW on my phone now, it’ll behave better? I may have to try it……

to be continued….maybe?

p.s. Please look me up on LINE, harrycubed. I’d love to hear about the current state of affairs in the kingdom and in the game, and more importantly, in all of your lives!

p.p.s.  I just let my wife read this. She looked up, smiled, said “Boy, if anyone read that and didn’t know you, they’d think you were a pompous ass”. I responded, “So they’d know the real me, then?” She laughed and went upstairs. Tonight, I can go upstairs with her, rather than waiting till I get gold in the kill event. It’ll be a nice change. I wonder if she’ll be pissy with me cause I’m taking up space on the bed.

To all of you who read ANY of my blogs, thank you. Please feel free to share this or other links on this website. Darkthorne put a lot of time into it and he deserves a little more traffic. It’ll be a nice send off for me too, knowing that I got a TON of new comments on my blogs because you all felt they were good enough to share with others!

Signing off


Hero: Leg Humper aka Bruce from the HVAC company

Kingdom #106 (formerly #94)

Alliance, MGd. The BEST alliance, even if you THINK yours is good. Trust me. I don’t lie.